Hello internet!

You can read this blog, look through the archives, and think you've found secrets. But the truth is, as evidenced by the date in which these were posted, this blog was written between the ages of 15 and 16. Whereas this is an accurate portrayal of who I thought I was during this time, it is an inaccurate depiction of who I have grown into.

I was nervous at this comparison initially and felt like I needed to delete this. However, I am fairly certain that given the fact that I am now in my twenties, it is clear to anyone's rational mind that I am no longer the little angst-ridden girl discovering the world of teenage rebellion that wrote this blog.

I cannot bring myself to delete this. So much of my time and thought had belonged to this blog. So much of my history is smeared across these pages.

Perhaps is is blind sentimentality - just understand - this is not who I am. It was who I was - but that person didn't last very long.

Goodbye internet!

You Are a New School Democrat

You like partying and politics - and are likely to be young and affluent. You're less religious, traditional, and uptight than most Democrats. Smoking pot, homosexuality, and gambling are all okay in your book. You prefer that the government help people take care of themselves.

mumblethesilent: dude... you
mumblethesilent: are
mumblethesilent: just
mumblethesilent: choc
mumblethesilent: full
mumblethesilent: of
mumblethesilent: AWESOME

anna, you, my friend, are rad as fuck.

i love britt... so, so much.

ma28d06wo42r12ld: and you didnt take a friggen picture
ma28d06wo42r12ld: i would pay to see that
ma28d06wo42r12ld: seriously i would have driven to durham ran in,
laughed, and left
ma28d06wo42r12ld: oh and said something to god of course
ma28d06wo42r12ld: i must pay my respects

poekennedy: i'm glowing because of god then
ma28d06wo42r12ld: i thought so
ma28d06wo42r12ld: was he present at the time?
poekennedy: well
poekennedy: yes
poekennedy: dont you know anything about funerals??

poekennedy: that last picture is when i finally got that damn thing lit
ma28d06wo42r12ld: hahahah
ma28d06wo42r12ld: lol
ma28d06wo42r12ld: took you like 4 times
poekennedy: I KNOW
poekennedy: hahaha
ma28d06wo42r12ld: hahah thats so badass
poekennedy: which, is obviously badass
poekennedy: hahaha exactly!
ma28d06wo42r12ld: haha
ma28d06wo42r12ld: man i wish it took me atleast that many times to
light mine
ma28d06wo42r12ld: i envy your badassness
poekennedy: well dude
poekennedy: it takes practice to suck that horribly at lighting
cigarettes
poekennedy: ..in a badass way

ma28d06wo42r12ld: and the other is just badass
poekennedy: haha
poekennedy: i took several badass pictures yesterday
poekennedy: im amazed at my badassedness
poekennedy: i was contemplating bragging
poekennedy: not to you, ofcourse
ma28d06wo42r12ld: hahaha
poekennedy: it would be silly to brag to someone on your same
badass level!
ma28d06wo42r12ld: haha oh yes
ma28d06wo42r12ld: you make me laugh alot
ma28d06wo42r12ld: you badass
ma28d06wo42r12ld: man look at that badassness
poekennedy: yes
poekennedy: look at it
ma28d06wo42r12ld: man you slay me
poekennedy: the end
poekennedy: hahahaha

mumblethesilent: so yea... i've decided he's a dumbass
motherfucker who needs to be institutionalized
poekennedy: hahaha
poekennedy: awesome
poekennedy: how come why
mumblethesilent: he was gonna come see me today and i called
him to see when he was gonna show up and he was like, "oh,
i'm not coming"
poekennedy: what the shit
poekennedy: who does that?
mumblethesilent: a dumbass motherfucker who needs to be
institutionalized
poekennedy: atta girl
poekennedy: get angry
poekennedy: it only turns me on

CutYourMullet89: i love you so much it hurts

how could someone not love dustin?

that's the real question here.

chOpstickchong: oooooh yeah
chOpstickchong: (dont remember)
chOpstickchong: haha
chOpstickchong: i'm not high all the time

chOpstickchong: i am so high i forgot how to hit the bong
poekennedy: hahaha
poekennedy: good job

chOpstickchong: i have a 6 year old girlfriend

xFxindingxExmox: i cant find the smiilies
xFxindingxExmox: no im serious
xFxindingxExmox: i cant find them

ma28d06wo42r12ld: oh my god guess who this is
ma28d06wo42r12ld: we are more than friends

PigPen668: wow... this is really weird but im glad youre mean to me sometimes
PigPen668: its better than being fakely nice or skirting things

poekennedy: so the first ammendment is really the most badassed one?
Trueangel76: yea
Trueangel76: we JUST got done studying the ammendments
poekennedy: hmm
poekennedy: damn
poekennedy: the first ammendment is cool
Trueangel76: yea it is
poekennedy: the second ammendment... yeah i remember learning about that one and being like
poekennedy: this ammendment is gay
poekennedy: it doesnt benifit me in anyway
poekennedy: and that one about not having to have soliders stay in our houses?
Trueangel76: yea
poekennedy: yeah... that one is gay too

poekennedy: dont get me started on the fifth
poekennedy: ..apparently, i'm really offended by the fifth ammendment

Trueangel76: i love you
poekennedy: i love you too
poekennedy: because you are
poekennedy: in fact
poekennedy: not the fifth ammendment
poekennedy: plead the fifth my ass!
Trueangel76: F-I-F-T-H
poekennedy: its gonna be the fifth thats gonna be "pleading" after i'm done with it!!
poekennedy: although, i do plead the fizzif

Trueangel76: wait y dont u like the fifth ammendment?
poekennedy: damn, that shit was good
poekennedy: its over used
poekennedy: no one knows what it fucking means
poekennedy: but they just loooove to plead it
Trueangel76: i sooo know wat it means

poekennedy: yeah
poekennedy: because
poekennedy: we are rad
poekennedy: but
poekennedy: they are not
poekennedy: like my rationalizing?
Trueangel76: haha yea

Trueangel76: i bet its even better unsober

You Are Fool In The Rain

You are a very bizarre person, to say the least. You don't think the way most other people do. And you probably don't really care.

You defy convention, and probably really like burritos. And you're very content with your life. You're a ray of sunshine. Piercing, bizarre end-of-the-world sunshine, but sunshine nonetheless. While most people are going to college to be lawyers or accountants or something, you'd be just as happy working at Tippy's Taco Stand in San Dimas, CA.

You probably have a really interesting car. You definitely do not drive a Honda Civic. There's a good chance that you smoke weed. There's a good chance you sell it.

Everybody worth anything likes you a lot.

Take the Which Led Zeppelin Song Are You? Quiz

mumblethesilent: you never really look forward to your period until you
think you're pregnant

PigPen668: aww
PigPen668: well ill be youre blanket of furry warmth
PigPen668: um... im furry now
PigPen668: i guess?
poekennedy: YES
poekennedy: YOURE LIKE A BANANA
poekennedy: FURRY ON THE OUTSIDE AND GOOEY ON THE INSIDE
poekennedy: hmm... ew...
PigPen668: HAHA

poekennedy: you know
poekennedy: when you think about it
poekennedy: bananas are really really weird
PigPen668: hmm
poekennedy: they just are
PigPen668: you are right about that
poekennedy: seriously, give it a good old thought
poekennedy: yeah!
PigPen668: their shape
PigPen668: thats weird
poekennedy: yeah
poekennedy: and
poekennedy: how you eat them
poekennedy: thats weird, the peeling process
poekennedy: and they look weird
poekennedy: like the actual fruit
poekennedy: with the seeds
poekennedy: and, its even weirder when you think about it as a FRUIT
PigPen668: yeah how they are like kind of fuuzzy on the outside and gooey on the inside
poekennedy: fruits arent supposed to be shaped like that!

poekennedy: we are very philosophical

poekennedy: you should be like "hey, atleast this proves that i'm not a lesbian"

poekennedy: if they're like, "you cant see boys anymore" though
poekennedy: i'd fucking THREATEN becoming a lesbian
PigPen668: haha
poekennedy: i'd be like "well daddy with my impressionable little mind, if i were only around girls... well gee, i fear that i may become... a... a lesbian..."
poekennedy: and then add this face =-O
PigPen668: *big care bear eyes* yeah daddy!

-----------------DESCRIBE--------------- ---
-- YOUR HERITAGE: irish/british/scottish.
-- THE SHOES YOU WORE TODAY: my birkenstocks.
-- YOUR EYES: blueish green.
-- YOUR WEAKNESS: my emotional unavailability.
-- YOUR FEARS: a freaking tornado. or any natural disasters really, because, there isnt shit you can do about that, you know?
-- ONE THING YOU'D LIKE TO ACHIEVE: to be rich and hot and like oh my god, i want to like *so* be the american dream. except with silicone. *hehe*


-----------------WHAT IS------------------
-- YOUR THOUGHTS FIRST WAKING UP: holy shit, did i really sleep that late? is that even possible? oh, well. cool.
-- FEATURE YOU NOTICE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX: hmm. face? i mean, it is what you notice first with everyone... really...
-- YOUR BEST PHYSICAL FEATURE: mine? i dont know. i'm going to be cliche and say my eyes. or i could pull the sexual route and say my lips. or, the one more true to form for myself, which would be my friggin badass scar.
-- YOUR BEDTIME: oh jesus. around seven in the morning is when i cave in and take sleeping pills.
-- YOUR GREATEST ACCOMPLISHMENT(s): how about still fucking being alive? haha... having not completely sucked throughout my life thus far?
-- YOUR MOST MISSED MEMORY: telling mike i cheated on him, that bleeeeeeeew.


----------------YOU PREFER------------------
-- PEPSI OR COKE: coke. coke o' all kinds, bitches.
-- MCDONALD'S OR BURGER KING: burger king. i AM the burger king. just so you know.
-- SINGLE OR GROUP DATES: single.
-- ADIDAS OR NIKE: adidas.
-- CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA: vanilla.
-- CAPPUCCINO OR COFFEE: coffee.


-----------------DO YOU------------------
-- SMOKE: yes.
-- CUSS: FUCK NO! CUSSING IS FOR FUCKING DEADBEAT LOSERS WHO DONT BELIEVE IN JESUS CHRIST. i mean really, jesus motherfucking christ is our damn savior!
-- TAKE A SHOWER EVERYDAY: yes. no. no i dont.
-- HAVE A CRUSH(ES): hmm, sure.
-- DO YOU THINK YOU'VE BEEN IN LOVE?: conflicting feelings on that matter.
-- WANT TO GO TO COLLEGE: i dont want to, but i have to. what can you do?
-- LIKE HIGH SCHOOL: when i went to school, fucking loved it.
-- WANT TO GET MARRIED: some day, if life takes me there, sure.
-- GET MOTION SICKNESS: yeah. if i read in the car i'm a goner.
-- THINK YOU'RE ATTRACTIVE: OH YEAH. I'D HIT IT. OR ME. SOMETHING.
-- THINK YOU'RE A HEALTH FREAK: no. i do not drink all those smoothies for heath reasons.
-- GET ALONG WITH YOUR PARENTS: for the most part, we have an understanding. an understanding that basically i can say whatever the fuck i want to, and that they understand its cool that i feel comfortable enough with them to be myself.
-- LIKE THUNDERSTORMS: no. they are scary. i regress to a full-on child.
-- PLAY AN INSTRUMENT: haha, kind of. a few.


------------IN THE PAST MONTH DID:/:HAVE YOU--------------
-- DRANK ALCOHOL: no.
-- SMOKE(D): yes.
-- DONE A DRUG: mmmhmm.
-- HAVE SEX: yeah.
-- GO ON A DATE: no.
-- GO TO THE MALL: yeah.
-- BEEN ON STAGE: no.
-- BEEN DUMPED: yes.
-- GONE SKATING: no.
-- MADE HOMEMADE COOKIES: no.
-- BEEN IN LOVE: y- maybe?
-- DYED YOUR HAIR: no.
-- STOLEN ANYTHING: not that i know of... maybe? who remembers these things!


-----------------HAVE YOU EVER------------------
-- FLOWN ON A PLANE: yes i surely have.
-- MISSED SCHOOL BECAUSE IT WAS RAINING?: no...?
-- TOLD A GUY/GIRL THAT YOU LIKED THEM?: yes.
-- CRIED DURING A MOVIE?: god, i will never admit to that!!
-- EVER THOUGHT AN ANIMATED CHARACTER WAS HOT?: no... um... okay. trent on daria was hot. but hes a cartoon so i was like hmm i would fuck him it was just a hmm if he were a real person he would be hot as hell... and the fox in disney's robinhood.
-- HAD AN IMAGINARY FRIEND: no. my imagination has always blown.
-- BEEN ON STAGE?: yeah, i have.
-- CUT YOUR HAIR: done it myself? yeah. i'm responsable for the month i had bangs. and i've layered my hair a couple times. because its not worth paying fucking $40 to get half an inch off your hair.
-- HAD CRUSH ON A TEACHER?: no.
-- PLAYED A GAME THAT REQUIRED REMOVAL OF CLOTHS?: haha... it wasnt required, but it happened anyway! then again, we had stopped playing the game at that point...
-- BEEN TRASHED OR EXTREMELY INTOXICATED: yes.
-- BEEN CAUGHT "DOING SOMETHING": haha... "something"... yeah no i havent. by a parent? or like, by a friend? because, thats a different answer!
-- BEEN IN A FIGHT?: yeah.
-- BEEN CALLED A TEASE: no.
-- GOTTEN BEATEN UP?: no.


-----------------THE FUTURE------------------
-- AGE YOU HOPE TO BE MARRIED: uh... i dont know...
-- NUMBERS AND NAMES OF CHILDREN: emily? thats what my name was gonna be. its a pretty rad name i think.
-- DESCRIBE YOUR DREAM WEDDING: something descreet, not a lot of people there. nothing fancy. the wedding isnt important, the marriage is. you know?
-- HOW DO YOU WANT TO DIE?: in some incredible way that makes the papers, elsewise, whats the point of living in the first place?
-- WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?: a radio disc jockey. or a psychiatrist. yes, i know how different those are.
-- WHAT COUNTRY WOULD YOU MOST LIKE TO VISIT?: um... i'd kill to go back to italy. actually scratch that, no where in europe. bangladesh or india. i've been to both, but again couldnt kill me.


-----------------NUMBER OF-----------------
-- NUMBER OF PEOPLE I COULD TRUST WITH MY LIFE: 8?
-- NUMBER OF PIERCINGS: 5.
-- NUMBER OF TATTOOS: 0.
-- NUMBER OF SCARS ON MY BODY: a few here and there. i dont really want to count them.
-- NUMBER OF THINGS IN MY PAST THAT I REGRET: hmm... two... and they both happened within the last month-ish.


----------------FAVORITES------------------
-- SHAMPOO: panteen pro-v, bitches. or pert plus.
-- FAV COLOR: red.
-- DAY/NIGHT: night.
-- SUMMER/WINTER: neither.
-- LACE OR SATIN: satin... hmm. "you have satin sheets... are you're still a virgin? what??"
-- FAVE CARTOON CHARACTER: dr. wile e. coyote... of course.
-- FAVE FOOD: um. sandwiches. those are pretty cool.
-- FAVE MOVIES: american history x, reservoir dogs, fear and loathing in las vegas, bill and teds excellent adventure... and the list goes on...
-- FAVE SPORT: baseball. boo red sox!


----------------RIGHT NOW------------------
-- WEARING: two pairs of pants and a shirt.
-- DRINKING: i'm not drinking anything.
-- THINKING ABOUT: you.
-- LISTENING TO: creedance clearwater revival.

---------------IN THE LAST 24 HRS------------------
-- CRIED: no.
-- WORN JEANS: no.
-- MET SOMEONE NEW ONLINE: no.
-- DONE LAUNDRY: no.
-- DROVE A CAR: no.
-- TALKED ON THE PHONE: yeah.


---------------DO YOU BELIEVE IN--------------
-- YOURSELF: sure. who else is gonna?
-- YOUR FRIENDS: sure do.
-- SANTA CLAUS: mmmmmmmmhmm. psh, yeah. what?
-- TOOTH FAIRY: what the hell. as if it were even a question!!
-- DESTINY/FATE: yeah, actually. i believe in karma.
-- ANGELS: no.
-- GHOSTS: eh, i dont know. i think you have energy that stays around after you die, but i dont know if its your "soul". i dont know if i even believe in souls.
-- UFO'S: no.
-- GOD:


--------FRIENDS AND LIFE------------------
-- DO YOU EVER WISH YOU HAD ANOTHER NAME?: not really, i guess i've never really thought about it.
-- DO YOU LIKE ANYONE?: no, i hate you all. bitches!
-- WHICH ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS ACTS THE MOST LIKE YOU?: depends what aspect of my personality we're talking here... dustin is me. carol and i have simular ways of dealing with stuff, and we are monogomus weed life partners. even though, we cheat on eachother constantly.
-- WHO HAVE YOU KNOWN THE LONGEST OF YOUR FRIENDS?: khalina and haley, but i never get to fucking hang out with them, which blows. but i still consider them my friends... i always will. out of people i hang out with? carol. no wait... anna.
-- ARE YOU CLOSE TO ANY FAMILY MEMBER?: my brother is the closest to my age.
--WHO DO YOU HANG AROUND THE MOST?: carol, more than likely.
-- WHAT'S THE BEST FEELING IN THE WORLD?: meeting new people than you get along with right from the get-go. thats radical as hell.
-- WORST FEELING?: when someone doesnt trust you enough to believe that you fucking love them, thats not cool.

so, i was bored. fucking sue me.

PigPen668: whenever i see someone ill be like you know molli? yeah well shes the reason you exist.